From the Now-I've-Seen-Everything department comes this story published in the Herald-Enterprise out of Goldonda, Illinois, October 12, 2011. The first line of the story under the photo, in case you can't quite make it out, says, "Loveland Elise Wilkerson [that's the dog in the picture] is a Certified Therapy Dog and also assists as a youth pastor at the Golconda United Methodist Church. She also recently presented lap blankets and a walker bag to the Pope County Care Center . . ."
Hm, "she"?
HT: Rev. Michael Henson.
Pastoral training has (wait for it)... gone to the dogs. (rim-shot).
ReplyDeleteThis reminds me of the the following exchange from this site:
ReplyDeletehttp://user.txcyber.com/~wd5iqr/tcl/ELCA.htm
Ed. At the last MS District Convention (1997) this piece of garbage was passed about. A Pastor's sister who is in the ELCA also sent him the same piece of trash from North Dakota. He wrote a response to it, and it follows at the bottom. The last two stanzas of "Insufferable" are very good!
Anniversary Hymn
(Anniversary of what we don't know.)
sung to St. Denio (Immortal, Invisible)
Unmoving, unshaking, and stubborn as mules
'cause we've set up all sorts of most rigid rules
Don't come to communion, we'll turn you away,
we're not like those liberals in E-L-C-A.
Our women are quiet, the pulpit's for men.
The rooster rules over the nest and the hen.
Don't ask any questions; just do as you're told -
good Lutherans, like jello, are made from a mold.
Like Luther, we're grounded in God's faith and fear.
We sing Back with gusto and brew our own beer.
We don't want outsiders; our church is the best.
We're God's chosen people, the LC-MS.
This is the answer to the ELCA
INSUFFERABLE
To be sung to the tune St. Denio
(Immortal, Invisible, God Only Wise)
Insuff'rable, smug we're so full of ourselves
If only all others were like us as well.
Who needs the Lord Jesus as we know the way,
We are so adaptable E-L-C-A.
Since Scripture is myth we choose what we will hear,
Who knows what we will believe in only a year.
The Reformed and the Romans are welcome to dine
At our open altars. It makes us feel fine.
Our Lord he was bound by the Norms of the day,
If he were around now, he'd do it our way.
He left much unfinished and much to improve
That's where we come in; we're the church on the move.
We now ordain women, and we will not stop
Till gays, dogs and donkeys will all have their shot
At being called pastors, to lisp, bark or bray
The PC pronouncments of E-L-C-A.
What I want to know is whether the dog wears a Pontiff 2 or Pontiff 3 collar (I wear a 3).
ReplyDeletePax,
Fr. J. W. Berg
I would like to know when that Dog will be asked to present at the CSL Theological Symposium. I believe next years topic is "Practical Theology and its great Tehologians: An Authentic Look at the Practice of Real Pastoral Ministry"
ReplyDeletepope county... heh.
ReplyDelete